A vampire's Heart ache
by adamarie19
Summary: After Stefan finds out Elena slept with Damon he goes through the emotions that she's moved on, with his brother no less. Being heartbroken, will he turn everything off and become ripper stefan, or does he fight for his humanity and deal with this the way season 1 stefan would have?
1. Chapter 1

_**Okay, so this is my first Vampire Diaries Fanfiction, and I'm not sure if it's even that good, which is why I made it so short. I'd love some insight to what you think about it. I'm a huge Stelena fan, but I don't mind Delena. Please tell me what you think. Have a great night. **_

Stefan sat in the living room of the Salvatore boarding house the night after Caroline implied that Damon and Elena slept together. Stefan kept rolling through his emotions, being a vampire, everything is intensified, so his anger turned to furry. He couldn't understand how Damon could do this. Granted he had feelings for her, and he knew that, but didn't once think that Damon would act on them so soon after Stefan and Elena broke up. Taking another sip of the whiskey that he held in his hand, Stefan felt his emotions becoming out of control. He was angry, hurt, and confused. He knew he wasn't perfect, in fact he was the furthest thing from it, but at the end of the day, he acknowledged that and he tried his hardest to make up for everything he's done, all the pain he's caused and all the wrongs he couldn't take back. He and Elena were over, but that didn't stop the memories from coming back in. It was like a kaleidoscope, he could see the memories in flashes. It was like he was watching a movie. Hearing the front door open, Stefan stayed in place, not moving. He had his suspicions on who it would be. It was either Caroline, who had come to check on him, or it was Elena or Damon, or at the moment he was hoping for Caroline. When he looked up, he felt anger hit him. And the first thing he wanted to do was shut everything off, he wanted to not feel He wanted to go rip someone apart and not feel any remorse, but he owed it, not only to himself, but to Lexi, to fight his way back to his humanity.

"Hey, Stef, what are you up to today, no school? " Damon said, in a snarky voice

Stefan sat in silence. He knew that he didn't have it in him to have this conversation out with his brother, he knew if he started, he wouldn't stop, and he'd end up saying something he would regret later, so right now the best thing he could do was sit in silence. Even after everything he's found out, at the end of the day Damon was his brother, and he was the only family he had left.

"So, I take it your mad at me for something. Let me have it. Brother, what did I do this time? "Damon asked snatching away the bottle and taking a huge gulp

"I don't have the time nor the energy, today Damon. Aren't you supposed to be at the Lake house with Jeremy? "Stefan stated

"Klaus took over, he wanted perfection, and for some odd, unknown reason, he doesn't think I could do it. "

"Well okay. " Stefan said, sarcastically

"Have you talked, or seen Elena? " Damon asked

Stefan froze. There was the elephant in the room. A secret Damon was hiding. A truth that Stefan found out. And worse of all Elena and Damon didn't have the decency to tell them himself.

"I'm not sure, maybe she's up in your room. I'm sure the two of you can have a quickie real quick. "Stefan shot at them

"She told you. " Damon whispered, if Stefan had to guess, he would actually think Damon felt a bit bad. But then it was Damon.

"No, she didn't. My brother and the girl I loved hooked up not a day after we broke up, but they couldn't tell me to my face. I had to find out from Caroline, the one person who seems to be concerned about how I feel. The one person who trusted me enough to be honest. I knew you had feelings for her, and I get it Damon, more than you know. But why do you always have to go after the girls that I find? And if you wanted Elena, that's fine, you can't help who you loved but couldn't you have waited at least a week. And God, Damon couldn't you have the decency to tell me to my damn face? "

"I never wanted to hurt you Stefan. "

"It doesn't matter, because you did, you and Elena both. And I should tell you that I'm moving out, Klaus offered me a room at his house, and I took it. "

"You're moving in with Klaus? " Damon asked in disbelief

"Yes."

"He's tried to kill Elena how many times? "

"She's a vampire now, she can take care of herself. I can't bare the sight of you. Klaus may be a horrible person, but at least he's always honest about what he wants, who he is and what he does. Unlike my brother. Goodbye Damon. " Stefan said then sped out of the house


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thank you guys for the reviews. The first few chapters are going to be short because they are just conversations that I think needed to happen, but as the story progresses, Then, I'll end up making the chapters longer. I apologize for the grammar mistakes, because I'm sure there are a ton of them. Thank you for reading. Have a nice night. **_

Stefan sat against wall of the school cafe. It was after hours, and he had no idea what he was still doing here. Then where else did he really have to go. He was in this cafeteria. The night everything between him and Elena changed, ever since becoming a vampire she was no longer the person who put everyone first, she was no longer the girl that tried risked her life by going into a house full of a vampires to save Stefan. She was no longer the girl who helped him control his blood lust when he went off the wagon by letting him drink her blood, she was no longer the girl that fought for him when he pushed her away who when Elijah threatened to kill everyone. She loved. And no longer was the girl, who fought will everything she had to get Stefan back when he'd become a ripper again.

"Stefan? " A familiar voice out, looking up he's saw Caroline and Elena "What are you doing?" Caroline asked, as her and Elena walked towards him

"I'm just thinking. That's all that's left to do. Just think. "Stefan said, his voice off tone

"Stefan, are you okay? " Elena asked, stepping in front of Caroline

"Strange that you're asking me that. Elena, what do you care how I am? "Stefan snapped at her, and for once not caring if he hurt her feelings

"Stefan, I'll care about you. Why would you even say that? "Elena asked in shock

"This isn't the time or the place to do this. Stefan, I was just coming to see if you needed anything. "Caroline interrupted

"I'm okay, Care, but thanks. I'll catch up with you later. "

"Okay, come on Elena Bonnie is waiting at her house. " Caroline said

"I'll meet you there. " Elena responded with confusedness, then Caroline was gone

"Stefan, what's going on? " Elena asked, not sure what she did to deserve the hostile way Stefan was treating her

"When were you going to tell me that you slept with my brother? " Stefan asked, the hatred in his voice noticeable

Elena froze. Damon must have told him. What did she say? How did she say it? She loved Stefan she was sure about that, but she felt strongly for Damon too.

"Damon told you. " Elena stated

"No. He didn't. You see this whole time I've been trying to find the cure for you, and maybe it was partly for selfish reason, but the main reason was because you told me that you never wanted to be a vampire, and that you hated it. And then I find out you slept with my brother, not a day after we broke up. "Stefan shouted

"Stefan, you knew I had feelings for him. "

"Feelings are one thing, but did you have to act on them so soon? Couldn't you have a waited at least a week. And for God's sake Elena, he's my brother. How could you drive this wedge between us. For centuries I've wanted a relationship with my brother, and after everything he did to help bring me back, and help me control my blood cravings we were finally getting close and then you do this, and I can't even stand to look at him. "Stefan said truthfully

"Stefan, I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. "Elena defending

"It doesn't matter because you did. You ripped my heart into a million pieces and I don't know how to find my way back. You know last night when Caroline told me, all I wanted to do was go rip out someone's jugular. And I just want the pain to stop. I want to turn it all off. "Stefan opened up

"Stefan, you can't. You've worked so hard to be the better version of yourself. Don't throw all of that away. "Elena reasoned with him

"What do you care Elena, you have Damon now, and I'm done. I'm done with you and I'm done with him. "Stefan said as his final words

"I need you Stefan, don't walk out of my life. I don't want to lose you. "

"You lost me the minute you jumped into bed with my brother. You know a few months ago I would have said that you were the most loving, compassionate, selfless, warm person I met. I used to say that you and Katherine were completely different, that your resemblance was the only thing that you had in common, but now, you're more like Katherine than I ever thought possible.

Hearing the words Elena sighed. They cut through her like a knife. Was she really like Katherine?

"You don't mean that. " She stated her voice full of emotion

"Except I do. The only difference is Katherine didn't do what you're doing. Sure, she played games, but she admitted that. She'd be the first person to tell you that she wanted both Damon, and myself. And that she was selfish, but you, you keep going back and forth, and I'm done wasting my time. I'm not perfect, I know what I am. I'm a ripper that will always be a part of me. I've hurt a lot of people, and I feel that remorse, and I'll live with that guilt every single day of my life. But I will not do this anymore, I can't. " Stefan preached and then he was gone


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thank you so much for the reviews. I promise the next chapters will be longer, the first three were just scenes I wanted to get out of the way. Lots of drama is coming. Hope you enjoy this chapter. Please forgive all the grammar mistakes I wanted to get this up before I have to go to work.!**_

"You told Stefan I slept with Damon? "Elena yelled at Caroline when she flew open the door of Bonnie's house and went in

Caroline felt the furry rise in her. If she hadn't told Stefan he'd still be pining for her.

"You know what Elena, yes I did. And I won't apologize."

"I specifically asked you not to do that. I knew he would react this way. He's over reacting. "Elena said

"What is your problem Elena? You know what I may be your friend, but I'm Also Stefan's friend. I wasn't going to lie to him. I didn't flat out say hey Stefan Elena and Damon slept together, I told him the two of you were at the lake house. He put the pieces together on his own. And more than that he's not over reacting. You SLEPT with his brother not even a day after Stefan broke up with you. Broken up or not that was his brother. You put a wedge between them, a problem they'll never be able to fix. You did that Elena. "Caroline almost yelled

"How that is any different than when I chose Stefan and Damon was hurt. " Elena defended

"Because you dated and fell in love with Stefan long before Damon had feelings for you. You were with Stefan first, there for you were supposed to be off limits to Damon. You don't go after your sibling's lover. "Caroline said angrily

"I never meant to hurt him. " Elena said, her tone full of remorse for what she'd done

"It doesn't matter Elena, you did. You hurt him more than words can say. You were his light and now you're gone, all his world consist of his darkness. And I wouldn't be surprised if he turned it all off. It's okay though, right? Damon got what he wanted. "

"It's not like that! " Elena yelled

"Then explain it to me? Stefan gave up everything so Damon wouldn't live. He worked for thirty years with Lexi so that he could live on animal blood, to be able to go off of animal blood completely, to be able to feel, he did all of that and in one moment, without thinking I might add he gave it all up. Everything he ever worked for just so Damon could live life. And what does he get in return, you two sleep together. As far as I'm concerned, the two of you deserve each other. "Caroline said turning to Bonnie. "I have to go. I'll text you. "

"Okay" Bonnie said, not knowing what else she could say

"Care, don't leave." Elena said, not wanting to lose one of her closest friends over this

"You know, you're such a hypocrite. You talk such a great game about Katherine, but the truth is you're exactly like her, but you're so much worse. She'll be the first person to tell you just how vindictive and selfish she is. As where you hide behind it. "Caroline said, leaving and slamming the door behind her

"Care, don't ruin your relationship with Elena over me. Listen, I love how good of a friend that you're being to me and I love that you're the one person that has been honest with me, but she's been your friend so much longer. "Stefan told her as they sat on opposite sides of the table at the boarding house

"I don't like who she's becoming. " Caroline admitted, remorsefully

"Me either, but there's nothing we can do. I'm done fighting for her. "

"I still believe that you and her are epic, don't let go Stefan. " Caroline tried to reason, but truth was she didn't blame Stefan one bit

"I just can't do it anymore. As long as she's sired to Damon, she's always going to put him first. And if being with Damon was what she really wanted, maybe I could see it, but truth is we don't know if its what she wants and the only person who can set her free his him. And he's got her right where she wants him, so I don't see it happening. "

"I'm sorry Stefan. " Caroline said and before she could respond a loud bang open and closed the door as a shadow raced into the living room where they were. Someone stood smiling in front of Stefan

"Katherine. " Stefan said


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thank you guys so much for all the wonderful reivews. I wasn't sure this story was even going anywhere. Thank you for being so supportive. I thought what better way to bring in a new episode tonight then to write a new chapter! Are all you Stelena fans ready for the throw down between Elena and Stefan? Sorry for the grammar. I know I keep saying the chapters are going to be longer but I wanted to add this one before I got to the point of the story.**_

"Goodbye Caroline. " Katherine dismissed her as she stood in front of Stefan her brow curls dangling

"I'm not leaving. " Caroline fought back. Stefan could only take so much from the Petrova bloodline

" Care, it's okay, go. " Stefan encouraged "I'll be okay. I'll text you. "

"Okay. " Caroline said and then she was gone

"What brings you to Mystic falls? " Stefan asked as he poured himself a glass of whiskey

"You, and you. " Katherine counted on her fingers. "Oh and I heard that saint Elena had turned into the thing she never wanted to be, and now she'd hooked up with Damon. " Katherine said, amusement in her voice

"Come to rub it in my face? " Stefan asked, gulping down his beverage

"No, I came to see if you were okay Stefan. I'm a lot of things, but I do care about you. "Katherine said, with sympathy

"You know you were right by the way. " Stefan relaxed

"About what? " Katherine asked intrigued

"Elena. She's not so different from you after all. "Stefan admitted

"I hate to say I told you so. " Katherine teased

"Then don't. "

"Stefan, I'm really sorry. I told you trusting Damon was a huge mistake you chose him over her, but he's always going to choose her. Damon is just that selfish. "

"I know, and you know what's weird, is that I actually admire you now. I mean, don't get me wrong, I still think you're a manipulated psychotic bitch, who uses other peoples pain to get what you want, but you embrace your selfishness. You're upfront about it, you admitted back in 1864 that you wanted both Damon and myself and Elena, she keeps going back and forth. It's like she's become this whole other person. God, why the hell am I sitting here talking to you about it? "Stefan wonders out loud gulping down more whiskey

"Because she hurt you, and right now you need someone to talk to you, yes you have Caroline, but she's also Elena's friend too. "

"Maybe. " Stefan responds as the front door slams shut and Damon and Elena appear. They stop in their tracks as they see the appearance of Katherine

"Katherine. " Damon said in a cold voice

"It's nice to see you too Damon. " Katherine smirks

"What the hell is she doing here? " Elena snaps as anger rises inside of her

"Oh, I came back for him. " Katherine said, pointing at Stefan "I figure since you're too busy doing the one thing you always said you wouldn't, which is to become like me, skipping between brothers. I'd come back to see what Stefan was up to. "Katherine answered

"Enough Katherine. Don't bother with them. "Stefan said, he had no intentions of being with Katherine, but there was no point in all of this

"I'm nothing like you. " Elena snapped

"That's biggest load of crap I've heard all day, "Katherine stated as she got up in Elena's face

Feeling the fury rise in her, Elena shoved her to the ground, but what she didn't expect was for Katherine to get back up and pin her to the ground "I'm a whole lot older than you, little Elena, which means a hell of a lot stronger. " Katherine said as she tightened her grip around Elena's neck then let go and got to her feet as did Elena "You're more like me than you'll ever know. I'm the most selfish person in the world, and I wanted both brothers, I loved them both, but the difference between you and I, is I can admit that. I can admit that I'm so selfish that I messed around with them both, my only regret is that I hurt the both of them. Which is exactly what you're doing. "

"You have no idea what you're talking about "Damon steps in

"Give it a rest Damon, out of all of us in this room, you're the most selfish one here. " Katherine said "I've done a lot of horrible things, we all have, hell we're vampires. But I can honestly say that I've never went behind my siblings back and slept with the person they loved not even a week after they broke up. No matter how you felt about her, that was off limits. You're the worst brother that's ever lived. "

The silence from Damon was a shocker to Katherine. She expected him to come back with some snarky commented as he always did. But she knew the silence meant Damon didn't disagree.

"Stefan would never think Damon was selfish. " Elena cut in feeling the need to protect him

"Stefan can speak for himself. Go ahead ask him. "Katherine dared

"You want to know what I think. I think the both of you are selfish. "Stefan started "I'm not saint, and I'm not going to pretend that I haven't done some horrible things because I have. I became a ripper, hell I bit you Elena and not a day goes by that I don't regret that. I've acknowledged the fact that I've made mistakes too, and I've done some selfish things like what I did to Jeremy. It was wrong of me, and I wish I could take it back. But with that being said, I'd never do what the two of you did. I worked for thirty years of my life, to become someone I could live with. Lexi helped me stop drinking human blood because once I tasted it, I always wanted more. I could never control it, it took a very long time to get where I am now, and in one moment I gave it up for you Damon, to save your life. "

"I didn't ask … "Damon starts but Stefan cuts him off

"It doesn't matter whether or not you asked me. You're my brother and I'll always choose you. After everything that happened with Katherine, I thought we'd always put each other first. I get you loved her too, but the thing is I was with her first, I fell in love with her first, but you went after her anyway. And you Elena, you used to be the most giving person in the world. I loved your empathy, your compassion, your selflessness, I loved it all and now the sight of you makes me sick. I have nothing left to say to either of you. And you know what's worse the night Jeremy tried to kill you, there were a million places you could have went. Bonnies, Caroline's or even Matt's considering he wasn't going to be staying there. But where did you chose to come? Here'd My House, which forced me to leave.

"She didn't tell you to leave. " Damon defended Elena

"You're right, she didn't but I love her, and to have to see her in the comfort of my own home, isn't something I could have dealt with and even worse, the two of you hooked up that night. "

"So now you're just going to hook up with Katherine? "Damon asked

"No, I'm going to live my life, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to live my life without either of you in it. Even if that means leaving this town for good. "Stefan said then he was gone

Stefan sat on the couch of Klaus's apartment as Klaus walked through the door.

"Did you get everything settled? " Klaus asked as he took the seat next to him

"I did. Thanks for letting me stay here. "

"You're welcome. Stefan, despite what you think of me, I've always considered you to be like a brother to me. And for what it's worth, I'm rooting for you and Elena. Maybe it's time someone gives her some insight. "Klaus said with a wicked smile

"No, if she figures it out, it has to be on her own, and don't think about compelling her. To be honest, I have no more energy left to fight for her. "Stefan admitted, regretfully

"She'll figure it out, but for now what do you say we celebrate. To our way to finding the cure. "Klaus says as he raises his glass

"I'm not sure she'll take the cure. Considering she's sired to him and he didn't completely break the bond."

"I could always make him break it fully. " Klaus offered, he was no fan of Damon he'd be happy to take his free will away

"No. They deserve each other, I'm moving on. ." Stefan stated with a sad smile

It was the pain of this realization that hurt him so bad. Even if Damon broke the sire bond, and even if Elena realized that she loved Stefan, they'd never be the same again. They couldn't be the same again. He hurt her by accident when he became the ripper again, but he fought his compulsion. Elena didn't think twice about jumping in Damon's bed.


	5. Chapter 5

_Hey Guys, I really just want to give you a HUGE apology for starting this story and not updating for a while. Don't think that I'm letting the story go, because I'm not. The truth is that my life has been crazy, not only am I going through some crazy family things at the moment, but I'm working on revising my first book so I can publish in the fall. Care to support it you can like my page at Author Ada Slowe._

_Anyways back to my point, I love each and every one of you and I would NEVER start a story and not finish, I've just got to get the craziness under control and make some time for some Fanfiction writing. I promise that it will come soon, just please don't give up on it. I'm SO sorry. I love you guys. Have a great night._


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